FIND OUT………….. WHO'S AT YOUR WHEEL ROY……..OR REG! Score A 1 point B 2 point's C 3 point's D 4 point's Question No.
1) You are out on the town and a little worse for wear, in a dimly lit bar supping your favourite tipple When a girl comes over and shows an interest, she seems a little easy does this?
A Unnerve you; she doesn't seem the classy type your parents would approve of!
B Stir an interest, perhaps you should trade phone no.s and arrange to meet when you can see straight.
C Give you thoughts such as "every holes a goal!"/"Well its 2AM …. What the heck!"
D Tempt you to buy her a drink, while sneakily reaching inside your jacket to a small quantity of high strength Sedative/chloroform……….. Mmmmmmmmmm.
2)Upon getting said girl back home/hotel room you get undresses together only to be met with a nasty and sum what unexpected surprise…… the girls not a girl ROY!!!!!!!!!! Do you?
A Run out of the room at high speed, then book in immediately to counselling/ hypnotherapy to ensure the mental scars are destroyed.
B Politely make up an excuse such as… "Ahh just realised I left the cooker on, back in a bit……." Then not return!
C Have thoughts such as "every holes a goal"/"well its 2.30Am …. What the heck!"…… [Ensuring no other roys & reggies will find out]
D Continue undeterred with the chloroform plan……………. NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW!
3) The following day after the night before, having just spent it with the girl from question 1 do you?
A Phone the said girl, and attempt to book a wedding date, tell parents, and prepare a ticket for your brother in Vietnam back for the big day!
B Call her, take things steady and book a nice quite table at your favourite restaurant [then pretend to know the waiters by name by calling out "Garson"!!! When ever you want something.
C Turn off the cell phone, ignore all calls, do not under any circumstances return them!
D Find a suitable shallow grave, and cover it with leaves.
4) What would your fantasy girl be?
A Sparkling personality, a real royetta, the kind that would look after you through the grey old years!
B Fit as Fuck! Tits like Jordan, legs like Liz Hurley, face like…. Well who cares, I mean who looks at the mantle piece when you're stoking the fire!
5) Which of these celeb's [all of which begin with the letter J] would be your more ideal role model?
B Jonny Vaughan [Whatta Roy!]
C John Leslie
D Jack the ripper
6) Safe sex is?
A Post marital
B The undertaking of carnal love whilst using a sheath, or other protective barrier
C Up the arse [she can't get preggers that way!]
D Leaving no evidence for potential prosecution
7) You find yourself in a brothel in a Scandinavian country, surrounded by beautiful women you cant help yourself but to put your hand in your pocket to pay for the services of a young fillie, after paying do you then?
A Gaze into her eyes, tell her that she is the most beautiful girl you've ever seen, and just hold her [for 11 min 35 sec's] Then tell her you will save her from this hellish life of debortuary [and £400 a night], and travel to her place of work again and again in order to gain her trust! [and at no time even think of demanding a refund!]
B Ask her to be gentle with me cos its your first time, then proceed to go at it like a Spanish porn star!
C Stumble into the back room with her in a state that can only be described as "unaware", have trouble recalling the rest of the tale due to drug and alcohol intake, but leave with a sore arse and 3 theories as to how it could have happened???
D Proceed into the secluded room; corner the young girl asking "are you afraid?" and perhaps indulge in a lite chat [ABOUT DEATH!!!!!!!] before continuing the job aggressively requesting that she "play dead" throughout.
8) You find yourself on a stag do in Amsterdam holding two items, one is a large bag of mushrooms, the other is an instruction manual, do you?
A Eat half of one mushroom, then sneakily chuck the rest when the cotterel of roy's isn't looking, then sware blind you saw a dog melt!!!!!
B Read carefully the instructions, then allocate as necessary, taking in the intake advice carefully so as to avoid any unpleasantness while still retaining the appropriate high levels of good feeling and unawareness.
C Allocate the whole bag first, smoke some draw, then read what you should have done……… giggle at everything……. Then perhaps take advice from said instruction manual if ill feeling ensues.
D Immediately throw the instructions away…. There for Poofters!!! Allocate the whole bag, then some beer and weed, lose the ability to speak walk and talk, becoming eventually paranoid to the extreme, only to be found hours later crawling around a hotel room in your pants repeating the words " I'm afraid of everything". "I'm afraid of everything".
9) borrow your friends car as your vehicle is unavailable, unfortunately you have an accident when a bush ran across the road in front of you causing you to crash into it at great speed, do you?
A Immediately phone your mate Roy explaining everything, book the car in for repair and pay for all repairs.
B Explain to Roy that it was the bushes fault, and you are hard up for cash, offer to pay the excess, and buy him a pint to say sorry!
C Blame the incident on Roy's poor maintenance of the said vehicle and claim compensation through claims direct, only to feel the pinch of guilt and go halves with the insurance monies!
D Say nothing for one week, lend the money to get a plane ticket to Germany from said Roy, then flee the country abandoning the vehicle round a relatives house, and leave some T Cut and no petrol money. Hang up on said Roy when conversation arises.
10) You find yourself engaged to a fine young girl, but feel [like most roy's & reg's do] a little bit trapped by commitment do you?
A Marry the girl anyway, saying nothing but I love you's, you'll soon get over the fear and shes a fine young Royetta!!!!
B Postpone wedding plans by a diversionary tactics such as "oh got no money, babe we can't afford it"…. "its only a bit of paper"…. .."What if it ruins what we've got"……."I love you so much I want our wedding to be really special, so lets save for just a few more months" [then turn the months to years]
C Do absolutely nothing….. Don't even move so she suspects you may be dead, which will inevitably put her off marriage.
D Flee the country!!!!!
11) Where do you feel most at home?
A In a nice comfortable sofa, with a cup of tea, and coronation street on.
B In between 2 breasts
C In between 4 breasts
D In a hollowed out volcano lair, with your face chiselled into the rock outside!
12) Finally Roy's and reg's……. Do you do [or have you done] [or thought about for any length of time?] any of the following [1 point for each ticked]
1 Fart into a cupped hand before smelling it?
2 Eat your own earwax?
3 Look at filth on the net, when the missus isn't in? 4 Wank over said filth on the internet when the misses isn't in?
5 Blame the sticky mouse on your children?
6 Have dreams about members of the same sex…. But never admit it?
7 Par-take in one-night stands?
8 Been fiddled with?
9 Par-taken in part of an on stage sex show?
10 Sold your body for sex?
11 Tried to sell your body for sex, without success?
12 Caused civil unrest?
13 Killed anyone?
14 Chloroformed anyone?
15 Had sex with person/persons who were not alive at the time of intercourse?
16 Incurred enormous phone bills due to over use of sex lines?
17 Continues to incur endogamous phone bills due to continued over use of sex lines?
18 Wanked so much your knob bled?
19 Had an incident which could fall under the category…. Piss related?
20 Stalked anyone across borders into other countries?
So how did you do? Are you a Roy?????? Or are you a Reg??????
Unfortunately you've ended up on the wrong site FWANK! Fwanks are really the living dead, moving talking walking living DEAD! They know not what living is all about, they follow the path that life gives them Never straying from it, or wondering what they could achieve/mischieve if they wondered down that other road down there?
Fwanks are born they live… they die….. no one remembers.
Congrat's mate you are a ROY!!!!!!! You are strong and dependable unto the last, your mates can depend on you, as can everyone else! You enjoy the wonder of life, but remain sensible thoughout [when aware anyway]. Roy is the rock others can depend on, perhaps not as mischievious as those with a little more Reg, And you may not ultimately have quite as much fun, but you will be surrounded by cool peep's Because you are the force that binds them!
" Roy is all around us, he binds everything, he is between me, you and the rock" Grand Master Yoda [Jedi & Roy]
Scores 35 - 45
ROY & REG TOGETHER
You are truly amongst like minded roy's and reg's here at royandreg.com. You know the endless struggle between roy's dependable diamond geeza Altruistic character, and his brothers Reg lust for all things "a little bit naughty"!
Like most of us sometimes Roy's driving the mind, another time it might be Reg. But most of the time they're "rumbling" for control of the spirit! It's the best way to be, for to be without absolute direction, leads us not to take The path laid out, but to wonder off in another direction….. and have some fun!
MORE REG NOW…….. THAN ROY………..
Reg! You have truly lost [or killed?] brother Roy. Brother Reg is driving your mind, while brother Roy is either gagged, Or other wise unable to prevent Reg wreeping a bit of havoc!
Evil is one word to describe you, but not evil in the … going to hell for Your devilish crimes kind of a way. Evil in a…………………………… funny way!
Reg, you are truly a selfish and unpredictable type, who would sell out His friends and his family for personal gain, and is essentially only out for No.1.
You probably lie religiously, your mates never know whats the truth, whats part truth, Or what blindly made up on the spot!
The best country for Reg is undoubtly Germany…. The most evil of all countries. Move there, stalk girls across international borders, lie all the time, Sleep with pro's, drink to much, and blag money out of your mates for flights home… In an EVIL way…. And most of all ….. don't change … Reg will lead you to fun!
" Your more Reg now … than Roy……" Obi Roy [jedi and roy]
" Join me…. On the Reg side of the force….." & " You don't yet understand the POWER of the Reg side" Darth Reg [Former Roy turned Reg]